


The Meteor Shower

by orangetree



Category: South Park
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-29
Updated: 2018-11-29
Packaged: 2019-09-02 08:40:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,862
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16783504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orangetree/pseuds/orangetree
Summary: Stan Marsh wished he had met Craig Tucker first. He wished he had the balls to tell him how he felt. He wished the relationships around him were easier.





	The Meteor Shower

Kenny met him first. He met Craig Tucker in one of those bullshit first year courses that most colleges make you waste your time taking. He sat down next to the hottest person in the class, as was his way and introduced himself. Stan remembered the first time he brought Craig back to their dorm room to hang out. He heard the murmur and laughter through the walls of his bedroom. He heard the bed squeaking later, the cry of someone moaning Kenny’s name softly, praising the deity of his choice. The next morning he timidly knocked on Kenny’s door to see if he wanted to get breakfast. He expected to see Kenny, he saw someone else entirely. Craig Tucker was dark haired and dark eyed and so fucking beautiful Stan almost punched them in the face for it. He had bruises on his collar bones, shoulders and throat. He looked Stan over with those big dark eyes, weighing this situation and deciding to shut the door without saying anything. Stan had to catch his breath, he wasn’t expecting that. The door opened back up and the most beautiful creature Stan had ever seen was wearing Kenny’s baseball pullover sweatshirt and baggy pajama pants. 

“I'm sorry about that.” His voice was a nasal monotone and Stan couldn’t take his eyes off of this human being’s eyes. “Im Craig by the way.” He greeted him. He sat down on the futon like this was his dorm room and Stan just silently sat down besides him.

“Im Stan.” They shook hands formally and Craig’s hand was smooth and tan and soft. He had small palms and long fingers. Graceful sort of hands. The tips were calloused like Stan’s, so he must play a string instrument too. He made a mental note to ask him about that. Make friends, find commonalities with people. “How do you know Kenny?” He wanted to ask are you dating Kenny? Are you dating anyone? How do you feel about maybe getting married tomorrow and getting a dog and maybe a house with a picket fence? That seemed rather forward though and Stan Marsh learned the hard way you have to play it cool or you end up puking all over someone’s face for three years. He kinda wanted to puke right now honestly.

“He's a friend, we have one of those bullshit first year classes together. The one with study skills.” Craig pulled his sweatshirt sleeves over his hands. “We just hook up sometimes.” He added looking over at Stan. His eyes drifted down to the bruises on Craig’s throat, they were pretty like a pearl necklace and he wore them with grace. He smelled like herby shampoo and Kenny’s cologne. His hair looked soft and it was sticking up everywhere and he wanted to touch it. He wanted to touch his soft curved doll cheek with its constellation of freckles and trace over his groomed dark brows. He wanted to press his lips against his soft plush pink ones and this always happened to him. He fell too hard too fast and ended up obsessing over someone who barely acknowledged his existence. Stan Marsh was nothing if not consistent.

Craig ended up staying for a bit and they talked about everything. About their majors, or their wannabe majors. Stan was deciding between biology, he thought being a vet could be cool or music, he thought that could be cool too. Craig had his sights on either Astronomy or astrophysics and that just made his head hurt to think about. Craig liked music, he liked small animals, he had a guinea pig, it was here at school with him. Yes, Stan could meet Stripe 7 if he wanted to. He played the viola and he went to a Catholic high school. He was from a small mountain town in Colorado too and went here because they had a really nice observatory. He wanted to see the famous observatory in LA they shot Rebel Without a Cause at. He liked cold weather and sweaters and looking at the snow from a safe distance inside. He was perfect, Stan couldn’t believe he didn’t meet him first.

“What’s your roommate like?’ He asked Craig curiously. Maybe if this roommate was a nightmare, he would be forced to spend time here and they would fall in love organically. Like a movie, reaching for the same mug of cocoa and they would lock eyes and it would be fate. For now he would settle for handing him the second cherry poptart out of his own foil pack of them. Not romantic comedy worthy, but it was a start.

“Hes cool, we were friends our whole lives, so this was easy. His name is Tweek. We went out from the fourth to sixth grade, so pretty dramatic.” He deadpanned at him. “He's really good to me, I love him a lot.” Tweek was a theater major and he played the piano and they kept very opposite schedules. He stayed up all night reading conspiracy websites and Craig learned how to tune this out in order to get any sort of resemblance of sleep. 

“Oh fuck, I should get going. I need to get back to my room and shower and get to work.” Craig looked at his iphone and gathered up his clothes. “Tell Kenny I’ll text him later. Thanks for the breakfast and the talk, very nice to meet you Stan Marsh.” He grabbed his navy blue wool duffle coat and out the door his disappeared. He disappeared like the dream he was to Stan Marsh. In the eighteen years he had been alive, he had fallen in love twice. One was Wendy Testaburger. She was awe inspiring and amazing and so out of his league. She was the smartest person in their school and beautiful and Stan couldn’t believe she liked him. They broke up the summer before college for good, he didn’t want her to miss one thing at Princeton. He wanted her to meet awe inspiring men and have great love affairs and debates and everything else he couldn’t give her. He wasn’t heartbroken like he thought he would be when they parted. It was bittersweet and it was the right thing to do. He was giving her the permission to live the life she honestly deserved. They stayed friends and she still doled out the life advice he so desperately needed at times. He was more than grateful for her

The second time he fell in love was at 8:49 am on this October 19th. When he looked into the giant brown eyes of Craig Tucker, he felt something. This crystalizing moment where everything else in this world melted away and it was only Craig and him. As he listened to that monotone voice, that weird snorting laugh. Craig was going to live in his brain and in his heart and on his phone until the end of time. He wanted to know everything about Craig Tucker and he wanted to tell him everything in return. He wanted to peek inside the brain of this odd, gorgeous creature. All he could concentrate on was how lucky Kenny was. Kenny got to touch and kiss and laugh and talk with this person. This strange, lovely person who came out of nowhere to take up permanent residence in the conscience of Stan Marsh. He felt like everything he had ever known will change. There was a before and an after time of meeting Craig Tucker. He was so dramatic, it was always life or death with Stan. He wanted and he yearned and he pined and he was very good at that sort of thing.

“Your friend Craig said he would text you later.” He told Kenny when he came in from his work study job. He worked in the first year center at a smoothie stand and he always brought Stan back something. Pastries, fruit, smoothies. Free food they ate when they were too stoned to look for something else. He didn't want to hate Kenny McCormick in that moment, but god did he ever. Why did Kenny have to sit down next to Craig Tucker in their stupid study skills class, why did they have to start texting, laughing together. Why did they have to start fucking, why did he have to hear them through the thin dorm walls. It piqued something in him, all he could think about was Craig. He wondered what Craig sounded like, if he was loud or quiet? He clearly likes having his throat and collarbone chewed on. Did he keep his sleepy eyes open or closed as you thrusted into him? Would he clutch at your shoulders or dig his nails into your back? Did he want it gentle? Or rough? Would he want to stay the night afterward, cuddling, letting you hold him in your arms? He closed his eyes for a moment thinking of Craig Tucker underneath him.

“Oh shit, I forgot I left him here. Im sorry dude, it wasn’t awkward was it?” Kenny pulled the smoothie hut tee shirt off and tossed it in the pile of dirty laundry that decorated their living room. It smelled like cheap cologne and fruit. “He’s pretty hot though right?” Kenny pulled another worn tee shirt with the name of his high school on it. Some old homecoming shirt, he looked like a homecoming king to Stan. Like the sort of everyone liked, easy going and friendly. He could see why Craig liked him too. 

“Hes cool.” Stan just mumbled hoping Kenny wouldn’t notice his red face and drop it. Kenny just pulled out his vape pen and they smoked some weed that was supposedly flavoured like rock candy but it all tasted like weed to Stan. Kenny ended up taking a nap and Stan heard his phone chirp. He had a cheap smartphone and he couldn’t help to sneak just a little peek at it. Craig wanted to know if Kenny wanted to meet him in the cafeteria for dinner. He felt his heart beat and it would all be so much easier if he just ignored this ridiculous crush and focused on making his own friends. Meet someone else, someone lovelier than Craig. There had to be someone lovelier than Craig at this school, in this world out there somewhere. 

He found himself sitting across from Craig and his group of friends he had made here at school. A twitchy blond with an alice headband named Tweek, that was the roommate. A tall chubby sort of guy named Clyde who was the suitemate who had the same sort of nasal tone to his voice. A black built kid with short dreadlocks named Token, clearly the voice of reason in this crew. The last was a dark haired kid with crutches named Jimmy who got to have his own room because he was “handicapable.” as he called it, he liked to tease them about sharing their space. Kenny sat next to Craig, whispered in his ear and stole the fries off his plate. Flirting and easy going, he could see why Craig liked Kenny. Clyde looked over at him as he was watching Kenny whisper into Craig’s ear. He gave him a knowing smile, one that had seen this all before. He wondered how many times Tweek, Clyde, Token and Jimmy had to sit through a lunch like this.

Craig’s friends soon became Stan’s first and only set of friends he made at college this year. If anything, he could say he tried, he socialized, he found his tribe. He played basketball with Clyde and Token. He played Mario Party with Craig and Jimmy. Tweek was a harder nut to crack, but he knew he could win him over in the end. He was fucking around with his acoustic guitar when he heard a knock at his door. Craig was standing out there with sleepy brown eyes, an old Red Racer tee shirt and baggy pajama pants he had taken from Kenny. 

“Tweek needs to practise his movement exercises for his theater class, can I come crash here tonight?” He asked Stan with a yawn. His eyes were so big and so dark, they went on forever. It was like looking into the night sky and finding the answers to everything and nothing and he wished he was better with words so he could tell him these things. These feelings he had were so tightly wrapped around him, he could scream. This unrequited pining love that only teenagers feel this strongly. It consumed him and everything he did. He couldn’t study for his biology quiz without wondering if Craig ever thought about him at all. He couldn’t sleep or dream or have a quiet moment in his loud existence without wondering about Craig. If he was having a good day, if he was wearing that blue sweater that fell off his shoulder and he wanted to sink his teeth into his shoulder. What shampoo did he use, what did he eat for breakfast that day. All these mundane thoughts about Craig that were overwhelming him with pure white hot want. It spiked through his core, through his dick and radiated outwards. It flowed through his limbs and back into his stupid lust addled brain. 

“Yeah of course.” He moved out of Craig’s way and led him to the futon. He helped Craig pull it out and gave him a blanket and one of his pillows. His pillow would smell like Craig’s hair and he could hold into that for as long as he could. He felt Craig reach up and grab his arm before his left.

“Can you just lay here for a moment? I like having someone to just fall asleep next to.” He yawned as his eyes started to fall closed. Stan’s mouth went dry and he nodded best he could. He was losing it. He worried he would completely humiliate himself and he could just hear Craig telling this story in his nasal monotone. 

“He was such a creep. He kept trying to smell my hair and I woke up with his raging boner poking into me. Disgusting animal.” The people around him would all laugh and he would never be able to look him in the eye again. He tried to keep to his own side of the futon as his own eyes were falling closed. At some point during the night he ended up next to him,, Craig curled up into his side. His head was so close to Stan’s, his entire body just radiated warmth under those blankets. Stan felt overwhelmed by his senses. The smell of Craig’s hair, the thick perfume of it hung in his nose. The warm feeling of Craig’s soft skin, their arms pressed together. He was just drifting back off to sleep when the door opened.

Kenny wasn’t a subtle person. That was not in his nature, he was a big personality. He liked having attention and being wanted and being noticed. There was nothing wrong with that per se, but in this moment, both Stan and Craig took notice of him. He came home with a pretty blond girl on his arm. They were both tipsy off cheap keg beer, she had on a DZ sweatshirt, Delta Delta Delta. Kenny liked greek girls, they could bro down as hard as he did. Stan was going to wager a guess that this was not a moment Kenny wanted to be noticed in.

“Oh hey man, sorry to wake you.” He looked at Stan and then he paled and looked at Craig. This was awkward. Stan could feel tension in the air as Craig looked at Kenny and his companion with sleepy dark eyes.

“Hey Kenny. Hello Bebe.” Craig looked over at her. He knew this girl. The girl who ghosted Clyde a week into school and caused him to become very emotional about the whole ordeal. She just disappeared without a trace, Clyde was heartbroken. Seeing her here now, on his fuck buddy’s arm was surreal to say the least. 

“Can you excuse me for one moment. I need to talk to Craig about a school assignment, Just go on into my room. It's the one on the left.” Kenny basically motioned for Bebe to subtract herself from this situation. Stan thought he should do the same, but he had to admit he was curious on how this was about to go down. He reluctantly padded to his room and left the door open just a sliver. 

“Are you ok with this?” He heard Kenny murmur softly he listened through the slightly ajar door of his own bedroom. “I mean, you know, I didn't think you’d be here.” He trailed off and Stan had never seen Kenny at a loss for words.

“I'm fine Kenny, we said this was no commitment. Im hooking up with other guys too.” Kenny took both of Craig’s skinny arms and ran his hands up and down them. This was supposed to be easy fun with no strings attached. Just friends who hooked up, smoked together and hung out together. Nothing else. Not that this ever in the history of the world worked the way it was supposed to, someone always ended up hurt.

“Who else are you sleeping with?” Kenny’s tone was light, but Stan knew better. He was jealous. He could hear on the back half of his words. Who am I competing with for your time and your orgasms? 

“This was part of the arrangement, no questions. Can I still sleep on your futon? Tweek has some theater exercise thing and I don't want to be kept up all night.” He looked back at the futon. “I'm not going to say anything to Bebe, I swear.” He rubbed at one of his eyes and Stan saw Kenny nod awkwardly before joining Bebe in his room. Craig went back to the futon and curled back up like nothing had happened. He kept true to his word, he never said a word to Bebe about Kenny and was gone by the time Stan came out there the next morning. The blanket was neatly folded on his pillow on the put back together futon. He sat down and ran his hand over the blanket. He was pining too hard, that was his way. 

He didn't understand no strings. There were always strings, there was no such thing as a string free arrangement. There were always going to be feelings and someone would always fall a little harder. Sex was too emotional to be taken lightly like that. He knew someone would get hurt, he watching this train wreck unfold in front of him. He was the one who was hurting, he felt it in his chest, this tightening feeling. It hurt him when he saw Craig coming out of Kenny’s room in the morning, hair all over the place and bruises adorning his throat like a trophy. He tried to forget him, he tried everything to forget about Craig Tucker. He went on dates with other people, he went to parties on the weekend with Kenny. He tried to avoid the library where Craig worked. He tried to keep everything so friendly, so casual. No deep conversations about their feelings. No late at night talks where you always felt more honest in the dark. Learning all he could about him, talking about Craig’s family and his last boyfriend who broke his heart. His father and the disappointment he felt in him sometimes. How he wished he had gotten to know his sister better, how he missed his best friend Kyle like he would miss a piece of himself. Those conversations that felt epic and infinite, curled up together as the sun rose. Just friendly banter at meals, maybe a party or two, that was it. They could do this, he could be friendly towards Craig. But then he would see his instagram or his snapchat and it was like any progress he made was for nothing. He closed his eyes and he could see himself on top of Craig’s bony body, his big hands on his hips, clutching at them, thrusting into him. He tugged at his dick, Craig made him so hard. His smell and his skin, he was a sensory overload that Stan wished he could just get out of his brain.

Stan was giving Kenny a ride home for the holidays. He was coming home with him and they would spend the break together. He was looking so forward to this break, away from school, new classes when he came back. He was packing up the last of things when Kenny waved at someone.

“Dude, I told Craig and Tweek we could drive them too, they live super close to you man.” Kenny grinned his gap toothed smile at Stan and he saw him nudge Tweek to go up front with Stan while he cuddled in the back with Craig. Tweek shot him the most murderous of looks. He didn't like new people, he wasn’t a great socializer. He was stuck on a three hour car ride with a person he barely talked to. He barely spoke to Stan either, he just looked down at his phone and played candy crush. This was shaping up to be the worst ride of his life. He had to look in the rearview mirror and see Kenny with his arm around Craig, teasingly nuzzling at his neck. Craig would laugh that snorty laugh and tell him to stop it. Stan and Tweek were in the car after all. It didn’t take long for Craig to fall asleep on Kenny’s shoulder, his arm around Craig’s skinny waist. Kenny situated Craig so he was half laying on him, stroking over his dark hair, you know, like friends do.

Tweek waited until they were both asleep before turning to Stan. He wasn’t shaking, he looked pretty well adjusted up close. “So, you like Craig right?” He asked as he beat another level in Candy Crush. He could feel it radiating off of Stan, this intense pining want. He didn’t hide it very well, Tweek could see it in his eyes as he looked at Craig. 

“No, we’re just friends.” He expertly merged onto their exit. It was snowing pretty bad, he hoped he could get home. He would be able to at least get Tweek and Craig where they need to be. He would worry about Kenny and him later. He would hate for Craig to miss any time with his family. He was always worried about Craig, he wanted him to have an infinite number of good days. 

“No, that’s not the entire truth.” Tweek took a sip of his coffee out of a metal tumbler. “You like him, I see where the way you look at him.” Tweek knew that look, Kenny had it too. JP Hanna had it before he broke Craig’s heart their junior year. He could see it in the eyes of the men who left Craig’s room in the morning after spending the night with him. He knew that look. He rooted for Stan the most. He liked him, he was honest and interesting and seemed very in touch with his emotions. Craig needed that. He was not in touch with his emotions in the least bit. It was something he needed to work on, they were working on it. Tweek was very emotional, he understood this sort of thing.

“He’s not really interested in me, so even if I was, which I am not, then it wouldn’t matter. “ Stan turned the wipers up and tried to focus on the road. This was not the conversation he expected to have with Tweek. He was hoping for maybe a light easy one about movies or what their favourite bands were. Not are you in love with my best friend. He felt he should steer this back in a safe direction. “So Tweek, do you like movies?” He trailed off awkwardly. Tweek never answered him, that was a stupid question. Everyone liked movies.

“This is making you uncomfortable. I’ll drop it. But I will tell you this, Im rooting for you. I think you two would be a good pair. So maybe don’t give up.” Tweek went back to his game, but Stan could see this little smile on his face. Maybe he would keep the hope alive. Just a little hope though. Enough to give him this soft look on his face when he looked in his rearview mirror at Craig. He looked so lovely when he slept.

The storm was bad enough that he knew he couldn’t get Kenny and him home that night. Craig offered to let them stay at his house for the time being. His house was a sweet little victorian style that was painted a soft blue. They had Christmas decorations up and the house was warm and smelled like vanilla. His parents were nice and friendly, offered them cocoa and cookies while they made dinner. He looked at the pictures on their wall. Craig in his catholic school uniform, Craig with his viola. Craig’s sister Tricia in a cross country uniform, she looked just like their parents. Craig looked nothing like them. He didn’t hear him come up behind him, look at the pictures with him.

“I was adopted.” He looked over at Stan. “I've been with my parents since I was four years old.” He looked at their family portrait. Thomas and Laura Tucker were fair haired and complexed. Tricia looked just like them, had Laura’s bright green eyes and Thomas’ ginger hair. Craig was dark haired and dark eyed and smooth tan skin. He didn’t look bitter as he talked about his past, he loved the Tuckers, they were his family, they were his parents. It didn’t mean anything less to him. He loved them no matter what. Stan thought about what Tweek said, he rooted for them. Stan was more emotional where Craig was not, but that didn’t mean he had any less love in his heart for those he held dear. He cared enough about him to tell him this thing he kept hidden. He just talked about his family like Stan did. They drove him insane, but he loved them nonetheless. Family was family, it didn’t seem to matter where you came from, just where you are.

“You've never told me that before.” He looked over at Craig. He felt something in his chest, this overwhelming feeling of wanting to be closer to someone. He wanted to be close to Craig. He wanted to know everything about him. He tried to distance himself from him, they were friends, not great ones, but friends. But as they stood in Craig’s childhood home, in front of his childhood photos, he felt it. This warm feelings of want and love flowed over him, that coloured everything he did and thought and wanted and knew. There was a before and after, before he met Craig and after he met Craig. His life felt completely different now. He felt Craig’s hand against his for a moment and he took it. His palm pressed against Craig’s, their fingers laced together. Tweek was right, he had to try, he couldn’t give up. He loved Kenny like a brother. He was his first friend he made here in college. But he had to take his shot, go for the one thing he really wanted. It would be hard and he knew that someone would end up heartbroken. But some things are worth fighting for, Craig was worth fighting for.

“Someone can sleep up here in the bed with me, someone else can take the blow up mattress.” Craig’s dad brought it up and pumped it up for them. Kenny just looked at Stan and motioned towards the mattress. 

“Dude, take the stupid air mattress and put your headphones in.” Kenny wasn’t a bad guy, but he had simple needs. He didn’t think about tomorrow when he was living in today. He didn’t care Craig’s parents were down the hall or Stan was on the air mattress. He wanted to roll around on the bed with Craig. He wanted to eat Mrs. Tucker’s mac and cheese and christmas cookies and sleep in. All these things didn't make him a bad person. But in this moment, Stan had never hated him more. 

“Why can’t I have the bed? I did all the driving.” He wasn’t a person who made waves. But maybe he wanted the bed. Maybe he wanted to sleep next to Craig Tucker and wrap his arms around his slim waist and bury his nose into his perfumed hair. Maybe there was about to be a cold war in room 104, that Kenny McCormick and Stan Marsh both wanted Craig Tucker. Maybe he was finally ready to go to war. They weren’t a couple, Craig never said he preferred one over the other. If he had a shot, then it was time to start taking it.

“Dude come on, let me sleep up there with Craig, just take the mattress.” He motioned towards the mattress again. Craig came out of the bathroom in baggy pajama pants and an old t shirt. He looked between them, weighed the situation with his dark eyes. They were bickering like children. The bed, the mattress, who really cared as long as you got some sleep.

“First off, Im not fucking in my parents’ house Kenny, with Stan in the room. Jesus Christ, I'm a little classier than that. Secondly, you’re acting like children, I’ll take the mattress, you two whiners can have the bed.” He grabbed a pillow and a blanket and curled up on the mattress. Stan felt bad that they forced Craig out of his own bed, their arguing had this edge of something else. They weren’t arguing for the bed, they were arguing for who had Craig’s attention. Neither one it would seem in this situation. Their childish behaviour had blown their chances tonight.

“Hey Stan.” Kenny’s voice was quiet in the dark of Craig’s room. Craig was sound asleep and so was Stripe 7. Stan turned over and faced him. Kenny was his best friend at school, he hadn’t had an easy time making friends. But this all seemed bigger than him. This overwhelming, all consuming love he had for Craig Tucker. He would go to war for those eyes and that smooth freckled skin. His awkward limbs and dying cat laugh. He would burn cities to the ground for Craig. He didn’t want Kenny to end up a casualty of war, bu if he did, he did.

“Yeah.” He had his arm folded behind his head. Kenny turned towards him too. This was it, the dark was made for honest conversations between friends. No hiding in the dark.

“Do you like Craig?” He asked him plain and simple. No hiding in the dark. But he was afraid. So afraid. One false move, he loses everything. What if Craig was awake and he heard this? What if Kenny and him laughed at him after his little confession? 

“I don't know. Sometimes I think I do. He’s really cool. I don’t know, I like talking to him. He reminds me of my last girlfriend Wendy. He’s smart, he’s sarcastic and I like being around him.” He felt his cheeks getting red and hot. He was embarrassed. He was embarrassed by this stark almost confession. He had never talked about this, he didn’t know who to talk about this to. He couldn’t tell Kyle, he wasn’t ready for Kyle to ask questions. Wendy? Not that she wouldn’t be supportive. She would be and probably congratulate him for coming out. But he couldn’t talk to her either. Nothing sounded right coming out of his mouth. He just felt confused and it was hard to tell Kenny all this. “Do you like him?” He looked over at Kenny.

“I don't know dude. He's so fucking hot and is way too smart for me. He wants to study astrophysics. When I'm with him, i feel so cool. But he’s not mine, I can’t lay claim on him.” He told Stan with such honesty. “He's so out of my league, what would someone like him, with this house and that brain and that face want with a poor kid from La Junta? I don't have a pot to piss in.” Kenny’s voice was even, but he was scared. He had never been in a real relationship. They had that in common, both were scared. 

“So we both might like Craig.” Stan trailed off awkwardly. He knew this was coming, he sensed it. He knew they both couldn’t have him, “I don't want this to like, ruin our friendship.” Stan looked over at him. “You’re one of my only friends up here at school.” He was Stan’s first and best friend at U of Denver.

“Nothing is going to come between us. Bros before not hoes.” Kenny nudged him with his shoulder. “Plus, we don't even know if he likes us. He’s hooking up with other dudes too, so maybe he likes one of them.” Kenny pointed out. “Lets not cross that bridge until we come to it.” Stan looked down at Craig sleeping on the air mattress. He was all curled up under a blanket, all he could see was his black hair. Feelings were never easy. There is no clear cut instructions manual to get you from point A to point B. There was this wavy weird journey that never stayed on course. There were always obstacles, whether it be internal like you couldn’t get your shit together or external, like your best friend liked this person too. He thought he had learned this lesson in high school when Wendy and him were on and off forever. But apparently he never learned and would probably never learn because he was an emotional person with a big heart. 

Craig invited them to hang out with him over the break. They would meet at Tweak Bros, the coffee shoppe Tweek’s parents owned and then go from there. Sometimes they went to the mall and saw a movie or fucked around. Sometimes it was just hanging out at Craig’s house playing video games and listening to records. Being in someone’s space, like being at Craig’s home gave Stan a new perspective on Craig. How he was with his family, watching him interact with his sister. Even seeing Tweek and him on their own home terf. Tweek seemed less relaxed if that was possible, but he had mentioned his parents were a bit of a sore spot. He watched Craig and Tweek speak their own language, Craig being able to calm him down. It was what friends did. It made Tweek seem more human and Craig seem softer. Less of an ice queen fantasy. But a person with different shades to them. 

Kenny went back to La Junta to spend the day with his siblings. Kevin had long been done with school and worked as a mechanic. He had his own apartment and made a pretty decent living at that. Kenny’s younger sister Karen lived with Kevin for the time being and she seemed to be Kenny’s favourite person in the world. He talked about her in such a warm, glowing tone. She could do no wrong to him. 

“I’ll be back in a day or two dude.” He told Stan as he hopped in the front seat of a decently new silver pickup truck. He waved at Stan from the passenger seat and he saw Kenny turn to say something to what he could only assume was his brother. He was alone today for the first time this entire holiday break. He heard his phone buzz and pulled it out of his pocket to check. 

“Do you want to watch a meteor shower tonight?” Craig texted him. “It will run late tho, you can stay over if you want.” It was the night before New Year’s Eve and he had no real plans anyway. Kyle decided to stay in Cali over the break, it was still too weird to hang out with Wendy alone. He had outgrown his friend Eric Cartman. He had nothing better to do and they say how you spend New Year’s Eve was how you would spend the year. He could spend it with Craig and hope this was foreshadowing.

Craig packed up his mom’s SUV with a big blanket and some other blankets, his telescope, two tumbler thermos of hot chocolate and off they went to the big hill in the park near his house. It was quiet and cold and peaceful. They huddled up and Craig let him look through the telescope at the stars.

“They’re so beautiful. The night sky is huge and vast and it goes on forever. We don’t know everything about space, we’re still making new discoveries every day.” Craig looked so wide eyed and awe inspired. He just looked so peace with the stars and was so beautiful. As beautiful as the meteor shower and stars and Stan wanted to kiss him so badly. He had on his blue chullo hat and little yellow mittens. A big blue plaid scarf around his neck and his cheeks were tinged pink from the cold. It was the time, it was the place, the mood was set. They were literally looking at stars, they were alone. He couldn’t have asked for more.

He leaned in and pressed his lips to Craig’s so gently. It was chaste and sweet and he wrapped his arms around Craig’s waist. He could feel how slim he was through the layers of coats and sweaters. He felt his lips tentatively kiss him back, as if he was trying it out. He wrapped his skinny arms around the back of his neck and pulled himself closer to him. Stan just pulled him into his lap and Craig parted his lips, allowing him to deepen the kiss. They were kissing like they were dying and this was all that was left. They kissed like it all meant something and he needed nothing more than to kiss Craig Tucker. He kissed him until their mouths hurt and Craig had scratched his chin up on Stan’s patchy stubble. 

They kissed as they packed up the car, they kissed before leaving the park. They had so much time to make up for. They could have been kissing since October and it was now December. They kissed as they dumped their stargazing supplies in the Tucker’s mud room and kissed up the stairs. He kissed Craig Tucker as he pulled his baggy sweater, he could finally see all that smooth tan skin. He kissed his throat, his collarbones. Bit his shoulders, he left marks. He wanted Craig to see those marks tomorrow and the next day and the next day. He kissed him as Craig pulled off his unbuttoned flannel shirt and his Sufjan Stevens t shirt. He tossed Craig Tucker on the bed, his bed with it’s galaxy print duvet in his childhood bedroom. He unbuttoned his skinny jeans and Craig lifted his hips up to help him pull them off. Clothes were discarded, hands were everywhere. He touched and kissed everywhere he could on that warm soft skin. 

“Are you sure you want to do this?” He asked him out of breath, he had to know that Craig thought this was right, he wasn’t pressuring him. It was in the moment, it wasn't a planned thing. It was this spontaneous in the moment thing he sort of thrived on when he was younger. But now that he was older and there were bigger outside forces at play, he found himself second guessing the situation.

“Yeah, I want you.” He reached up and touched Stan’s chest gently. He touched his jawline and the corners of his mouth. Stan kissed his fingers and pressed his body onto his. He had never been with another man before and it was all new and exciting. He opened Craig up with his fingers and what he felt was so much lube, too much lube? He second guessed himself there too, but when he saw Craig’s giant eyes flutter shut and he pressed his head into the pillow, he was doing something right. He pushed in and he never wanted to leave the soft, warm body of Craig Tucker. He wanted to stay inside of Craig Tucker until he was at least eighty five years old. He thrusted forward gently, experimentally. Craig wrapped his long legs around his waist and the whole didn’t last nearly as long as he wanted it to. He stayed inside of Craig Tucker for a moment, catching his breath and gathering him up in his arms.

He rolled off him gently and he had never slept so well. He slept like he was at peace with the world and he was. He felt like he made some sort of deal with a divine power and in the end, he received Craig Tucker out of that deal. He slept with his arms around him, Craig nestled into his chest. He didn’t overthink this, he just let himself be in this moment. 

He felt Craig stirring in his arms and he kissed the top of his head. Craig looked up at him with those eyes and he saw they had this flash of worry. He wondered if Craig regretted this because of Kenny. They were close, beyond just the sex, they were friends. They were all friends and now this became infinitely more complicated. But he wouldn’t have given up last night. He wanted a shot with Craig and he took it. He felt Craig detangle from him and sit up. 

“Good morning.” He tried not to sound meek, but he knew his voice shook slightly. “How are you feeling?” He always worried about Craig over him, Craig’s feelings, Craig’s wants. He just hoped Craig wanted him. 

“Good morning Stanley.” Craig leaned in and kissed his cheeks. Stan turned away politely as Craig slipped some clothing on. “I'm good, a little sore, but good.” He was pulling on an oversized football hoodie. It looked like Clyde’s and that was confirmed when he saw the name Donovan on the back. Craig slept with him, while also sleeping with Kenny and wearing clothing that belonged to a friend. He was a who seemed to lack some sort of boundaries with the relationships in his life.

“Craig, do you want to talk about last night?” He asked him as he slipped black boxer briefs on and his jeans in the cold gray light of morning. “I don't want things to be weird between us.” He trailed off like he trailed off with Kenny the night he asked him if he liked Craig. He liked Craig, Kenny liked Craig. He had no idea who Craig felt about either of them. 

“Stan.” He started and he looked down at his hands. He was twisting his apple watch around his wrist, clearly avoiding this topic. “Kenny is one of my best friends, we have this arrangement. But I'm fairly certain he wouldn’t like this .” He motioned between them. “Maybe we just need to be friends until we can all figure out what we all want to be to each other.” Craig was a person who said very little. He didn't share his feelings very well. This was actually one of the most healthy expressions of emotions he had ever had. It made him feel hot in the cheeks and embarrassed like he said too much.

“I don't regret last night.” Stan blurted out. Craig looked over at him and touched his jawline gently, just like he did last night. “I'm glad we did that.” He mumbled. He wished they could do it again. And again and again and every night until the end of time. Until he departed from this earthly plane, he wanted to be inside of Craig Tucker. He wanted to make him moan like he did last night, kiss his smooth tan skin. He wanted to touch every inch of him, see him flush and sigh like that. He knew too much now, he had seen all that beautiful skin, kissed it and tasted it. There would never be a moment in his life where he wouldn’t be wishing he was making love to Craig Tucker. He hoped he knew that. 

“I don't regret it either.” He told him softly. “But I don't want to hurt Kenny.” He looked over at him. “I like you Stan, you're a good person. I like being around you. I don't want to lose either of you. Lets just see what happens when we come back to school yeah?” He reached over and squeezed Stan’s bicep gently and laid his head on his shoulder. It wasn’t what he wanted to hear, but he had him in some capacity. 

“What are your plans for New Years?” Stan asked him. Maybe he could stay, they could watch the ball drop together. It could be friendly, there could be pizza, pizza made everything so much friendlier. They could be friends, he had made it this far. 

“You want to go to a party?” Craig looked up at him. “One of my old classmates are having one, it's probably lame, but it's better than being alone.” He told him. He was right, any time with Craig was better than being alone. 

It was lame, it was a lame basement party everyone sort of went to in high school. Stan was on the couch next to Craig, both of them nursing weak drinks in plastic cups. Tweek was on Craig’s other side, smoking a menthol American Spirit cigarette Craig and him kept passing back and forth. Tweek’s girlfriend was nice, her name was Esther Stoley. She was half asian and had a twin brother. She was into musical theater too and went to University of Colorado Boulder. She put her hand on Tweek’s bicep like Craig did to him that morning, he couldn’t help but notice that.

“This is the lamest party we’ve ever been to.” Tweek’s hands reached for the stubby ponytail he had his hair up in. “Can’t we just go home?” He asked Craig. Craig just finished his vodka and cranberry and motioned towards the tv. The ball was dropping. Everyone was handed a tiny bottle of cheap champagne and a noise maker. Stan heard the countdown, he saw Tweek put his arm around his lovely girlfriend. He looked at Craig and Craig looked at him, he closed his eyes and leaned in when it was midnight. He felt his lips press against soft pink lips, he felt skinny arms around the back of his neck. 

“Happy new year Stan.” He heard Craig murmur against his mouth. He just pulled him closer and rested his forehead on Craig’s.

“Happy New Year baby.” He reached over and brushed Craig’s bangs out of his eyes. This is how he wanted to spend his new year, this is how he wanted to spend the next year. And every year after that. They both closed their eyes and rested their foreheads against each other.

The drive back to school was quiet. Kenny looked like he wanted to talk about seeing his siblings, but wasn’t ready to vocalise it to the group. Kenny had a very complicated relationship with his family. It was one part guilt, one part resentment and one part loyalty to them above all else. Tweek was texting his girlfriend, you never really got used to leaving someone. Absence never made the heart grow fonder, it just made you feel alone and sad. Stan looked in the rearview mirror and saw Craig looking out the window. For the first time in his life, he couldn’t wait to get back to school. 

For the next month Stan and Craig kept their relationship as friendly as they could. No spending the night together, no touching or kissing or anything that could hurt Kenny. It was hard, it was so hard to know what it was like to have him and have to pretend it could never happen again. He knew what that soft tan skin felt like under his finger tips, what it tasted like. He could taste him now, the soft pink plush lips, how he sighed and moaned. Sometimes he woke up so hard, throbbing from his core out remembering the way he felt underneath him. 

Kenny was out at a party one night with Token and Clyde, some fraternity thing across campus. He offered to take Stan with him, but it wasn’t his scene. He would have rather stayed in and played around with his acoustic guitar. He hadn’t really been very social lately. He was letting unrequited love colour everything he did. All he could think about was Craig, he wished they never hooked up at all over break. He felt pathetic and lost and he wanted to talk to Kyle so badly. But how do you tell your best friend you were in love with another dude? 

“Hey Dude.” Kyle always picked up on their facetime conversations. “I feel I haven’t talked to you in a bit.” He took a sip out of a can of Redbull and gave Stan his full attention. ‘What’s up?” He set his ipad up so he could keep his hands free. 

“I need to tell you something, but like, I don't know dude.” He pinched the bridge of his nose. “It's just kinda shocking.” He put his guitar down. “I met this person.” He started. Kyle looked interested now. 

“Great man, it took you forever to get over Wendy.” He remembered that messy situation. Wendy felt Stan wasn’t listening to her, Stan had questions about how he felt. Stan always ended up depressed, Wendy ended up annoyed she wasted her time with all this. They were better off as friends and everyone knew it. They eventually knew it too. “What’s her name?” Kyle gave him the most supportive look. Kyle was his best friend, he supported him no matter what.

“Craig.” Stan told him in this little voice. “His name is Craig, we hooked up over break and I'm in love with him. But its hard and it's complicated because he has this arrangement with Kenny my roommate. They hook up and I think Kenny might like him too. I wish you were here Kyle, you’re so good at doling out advice and telling me the right thing to do. I have no idea what the right thing to do is.” He admitted this all to Kyle in one burst. It was a lot to take in and he felt bad he just verbally dumped all over him.

“Well, do you know how Craig feels about you?” Kyle chose to address the easiest part of all this and would work his way back. “Because if he doesn’t know, then this is all for naught.” He pointed out. 

“I don’t know, I like hanging out with him, but I think he thinks I just want to hook up again. Which I do, but also love him forever and hold his hand and smell his hair and ask him about his day.” He babbled. Kyle smiled at this, same old Stan, same old problems with a new face in there. They stayed up all night talking and he felt this weight lifted off of him, Kyle knew about Craig, Kyle didn’t judge him about Craig. He acted like he had heard this all before. Which he had. But sub Wendy in for Craig.

“Dude, does this change anything between us? You know, that I like a dude?” He asked Kyle nervous. He wanted at least one thing in his life to stay the same, this was the constant. They were best friends. Nothing came between them.

“No dude, you’re still Stan.” Kyle tossed the can of Redbull in the recycling bin and yawned. “I should get going though, Im wiped and I still have a paper to revise tomorrow before turning it in. Tell him how you feel and go from there man.” He told him before signing off facetime. Tell him how he felt, go from there. That wasn’t exactly the hardest thing he could have done. But there was the Kenny of it all. He liked Kenny and he didn't want him to get hurt.. But Kyle was right, if he didn’t know how Craig felt, how could they go forward? How could he figure out what to do about Kenny when he didn’t even know if Craig had feelings towards him.

Kenny was too hungover the next morning to get breakfast with him so he went down to the freshman center by himself. He sat down at a table with his eggs, bacon and hashbrowns when he felt this familiar presence take the seat across from him.

“Hey.” Craig greeted him over waffles and a latte. “How have you been? I feel I haven't seen you since we came back from break.” Craig cut his waffles in neat, even strips, perfectly proportionate. Stan didn't want to tell him how hard it was to hang out, how hard it was to pretend they were still the same people they were before break. He had a taste of him, he had it all in his grasp. Not even the night they slept together, but New Year’s Eve. The way he kissed him and held him. Their foreheads resting against each other. When he looked into his dark eyes and saw so many things. They were huge and dark and vast and knowing. They were the night sky and they were awe inspiring. He didn’t think he could go back again. He didn’t want to go back, he wanted this. He wanted him.

“Im in love with you.” He just told him. He didn’t ask and he didn’t want to have some big grand gesture. He went for straight honesty and he thought Craig would appreciate that. He watched his face, his eyes. They blinked at him and he was collecting his thoughts. “I know we said we’d wait to see what we all meant to each other. But you mean everything to me and I'm in love with you. You don't have to say anything now if you need to think about all this, but I wanted you to know.” He forced his voice not to shake, don’t back down. Say what you need to say, be honest with him.

“I need some time to work all this out. I'm not saying I don't have feelings for you, but I just need time to see how I feel about this.” Craig looked uncertain, that was a lot of information to receive at once. He wondered if he was too honest, but he wasn’t going back on his word. He meant it. He was in love with him and he was tired of sitting around and not doing anything about it. He was ready for the fight now and he put the ball in Craig’s court. 

He didn’t hear from Craig for a few days and honestly, he thought it was all over. He said what he said and nothing came about it. That was ok, he tried at least. He was coming home from his biology class when he heard Craig’s voice behind his dorm room door. Kenny and Craig decided they wanted to try being actual friends with no benefits. Just friends, the only benefit being friendship.

“You like someone don’t you?” Kenny didn’t sound sad or accusing. He sounded like a man who knew he had to let Craig try this. While Craig enjoyed what they had, he clearly wanted something more. He had to respect that, Craig was putting himself out there.

“I do. I just, I don't want to lose you though. You’re one of my best friends up here.” He reached over and put his hands in Kenny’s hands and he squeezed them gently. 

“Who is it?” Kenny knew. He knew who it was, he could tell by the way they looked at each other. He could feel the tension between them and he had a good feeling something happened over break. Their shallow conversations and hang outs felt off. He knew Stan just didn’t think he liked him, he liked him. He liked Craig and Craig liked him. They belonged together. 

“I think you know.” He looked over at Kenny. Saying it out loud made it so real and he was so afraid. He had come out of a not great relationship, he had been good with keeping things easy and light. Keep his distance, don’t get hurt. But Stan Marsh had found his way into his heart and as afraid as he was, he had to try. Put aside his fears and the damage he endured from his past relationships and try for Stan. Give him a chance, he had nothing to lose.

“He likes you too, but I think you know what as well.” Kenny pulled Craig into a hug. It hurt like hell to lose him, but he couldn’t have lost him to a better man. Stan was the sort of person who felt things harder than most people. He had a big heart and so much love to give. He clearly wanted to give his love to Craig. He deserved that sort of love, that all consuming love that teenagers fell head first into. Kenny wasn’t that man yet, he needed the distance, much like Craig did. But Craig wanted to give this a try and see what it felt like to give himself to another person. 

Stan heard the door starting to open and he hid in the staircase so they didn’t think he was spying, which he definitely wasn’t. It was a free country, he could loiter outside of his own room if he chose felt like it. His heart felt like it was going to burst out of his chest. The easy part's over, now it was onto how to turn mutual feelings into something real. It was easy to have a crush on someone from afar and idealize them as this perfect being. They had to see each other as real people. Real people with flaws and bad habits and fears and everything else that made you a person and not some trope. That was part of the reason his relationship with Wendy kept failing over and over again. He never saw her as a person until they were broken up. She was his dream girl, she was smart and beautiful and passionate and fearless. But she was also self righteous, stubborn, wasn’t always sure how she felt about him. He couldn’t make the same mistake with Craig. He had to see him as a person from the start, had to accept the flaws that he possessed and forge forward with his feelings. 

He also couldn’t go rushing over to his dorm room with what he knew. He had to let Craig come to him on his own terms. The ball was still in Craig’s court, he knew how Stan felt about him. He had to tell Stan how he felt in return. He would wait for him, he would wait until this felt right. Until he faced his fears and decided to be brave. 

Kenny looked the same when he came in. He always expected heartbreak to make you look just a little different. But he had the same golden blond hair and crooked smile. He was smoking out of his vape pen and laying on their futon. Just like he left him this morning.

“Hey dude.” Kenny greeted him like he didn't have life altering news for Stan. Like this was a random Tuesday morning and they would probably go grab lunch after this. They would sit with their friends and act like nothing was going to change. Just as it did. Stan sat across from Clyde Donovan and listened to him talk about his boring english class and why did they have to take all these filler classes? It was so boring and he just wanted to jump into whatever it was he wanted to study here. He kept sneaking little peeks at Craig who was engaged in conversation with Jimmy over their physics class. Craig met his eye finally after days of avoiding him. After confessing to Kenny he liked him too, after trying to deny how he felt to himself. Craig held his gaze for a moment and gave him his little closed mouth smile. He couldn’t help but smile back. 

“Craig and I are going to try and just be friends that don’t fuck.” Kenny told him that night as they played Bendy and the Ink Machine. He felt Kenny looking at him, he knew why. The tips of his ears turned red.

“I'm in love with him.” He admitted to Kenny pausing the game. “Im sorry dude, I tried so hard to forget him. Be friends and stay out of your way. I don't want to lose you.” Stan was someone who understand basic human emotions. He knew Kenny was probably hurting. He knew Craig was hurting too. It's hard to admit you want something. He was hurting too, this situation was hard. The three sides of a love triangle like they were on some CW show. 

“I know you are, that’s why I stop fucking around with him. I need to get out of your way man. I'm not ready to be his boyfriend. But you are, so go for it. I love you both.” Kenny reached over and squeezed his shoulder like a brother would. “I mean, don't make out with him in front of me yeah?” He teased him. But Stan knew he meant it. He might have done the right thing, but he still had a right to be sad about it.

“I love you dude.” He nudged Kenny back with his broad shoulder. They didn’t really have to say anything else. The situation was what it was. .They didn’t lose each other, that's the best outcome they could have asked for. Stan knew everything wasn’t peachy but it wasn’t fractured either.

He went to the library to study for his math test, he needed to concentrate and his room was just full of distractions. He knew he had to keep on task, but he found himself dozing a little. When he shook himself awake, he found a paper take out coffee cup with a little message written on it. 

“Can you come over tonight?” It was from Craig, he took a sup of the coffee, a little cream, a lot of sugar, just like he normally ordered it. He smiled at that, Craig remembered the little details about him. He wanted to see him, this was moving forward. He knew Craig worked at the library, he made it his mission in this place and time to find him. There was he was, shelving books with his big beats headphones on. He could hear snippets of the Wallows coming from them. He always associated Let the Sun In by them with Craig. He didn’t even know why. He just thought about him when he heard it. He sneaked up behind him and grabbed him from behind, his hands on his thin waist. He jumped and he laughed at that. 

“Thanks for the coffee.” He greeted him. Craig looked up at him and in one bold move, he put his hands on Stan’s shoulders and leaned in and kissed him gently on the mouth. It was soft and chaste and perfect in that moment. He kept his hands on Craig’s slim waist and they rested their foreheads on each other’s. 

“Thanks for the kiss.” Craig deadpanned at him teasing. “Can you come over tonight? I want to see you.” He kept his hands on Stan’s shoulders. Stan had nice shoulders, nice arms. He was handsome and good and waited for him. He didn’t push him, he didn’t pester him. He was good to him. 

“Yeah, of course.” He tried not appear too eager, but he was dying. Every nerve in his body was alive with the spark of the unknown. The beginning of something big. It was finally happening, it was so close. He had been patient, he had given him his space and let him work things out on his own. Now they could finally come together.

Tweek was gone that night, he was at some drama department sleepover thing. Clyde and Token were at a basketball game. He arrived at Craig’s door nervous and hopeful and it was everything in that moment. Craig’s real smile when he opened the door, a slight charming overbite and little pointed canine teeth. A charmingly imperfect smile for a charmingly imperfect boy.

Craig’s room was neater than Kenny’s and his. Organized with bins and tubs labeled with snacks or study folders. Indie posters on the wall, a record player with milk crates of records resting beside it. His eyes fell on the music stand though. He knew Craig played the viola, he had told him that. He had seen his high school photos with it. But he really wanted to hear it. He wondered what Craig looked like playing it. If he even more lovely than he was now. A favour for a later day.

“Do you want something to drink?” Craig asked him and he noticed it for the first time since he had arrived. His hands were shaking. He was nervous too. “I have water and cherry coke and coffee.” He told him. Stan just took the water bottle that was offered to him. He sat down on the futon next to Craig and neither of them spoke for a moment.

“I like you too.” Craig eventually told him avoiding eye contact. “I've known for a while and I was too afraid to tell you. But I like you Stan Marsh.” He finally looked over at Stan with those big brown eyes and he put his hand in Stan’s. Stan laced their fingers together and pressed his palm to Craig’s. Craig put his head on his shoulder and they just enjoyed this moment for what it was. Two people who found each other and accepted each other for what they were. Craig was awkward and cold and was too afraid to show any sort of emotion. Stan was impulsive, emotional and wore his heart on his sleeve. He took losses personally and felt everything hard. Deep, he had a hard time letting things go. They were opposites, but they complimented each other. They needed each other. He could open Craig up a bit, Craig could bring him back down to earth. 

“I'm not good with talking about my feelings or emotions or you know, anything that falls in those categories. But I think I would be willing to give it a go with you.” Craig put his small hand in Stan’s larger one. His palms were smaller and slimmer, but he had long fingers. They laced their finger together and he squeezed his hand gently. 

“So we’re doing this?’ Stan looked over at him. He was so afraid they would make it this far and Craig would back off scared. He always jumped in with two feet, never faltered, tried not to overthink things. He just couldn’t see Craig as that sort.

“We’re doing this.” He looked over at Stan and rested his head on his shoulder. “I've only been in two relationships and one was with Tweek in the fourth grade. So, what do we do first?” He looked up at Stan. He knew the best way to answer that was just to show him. He leaned in and kissed him very gently on the mouth. Nothing frantic, no reason to rush from point A to point B. Just a gentle kiss to show him how much he liked him.

That turned into the frantic sort of making out that teenagers were good at. They made their way over to that narrow little dorm twin bed. There was barely enough room for one of them, the lack of space made everything more intimate. He slipped his hands under Craig’s t shirt, going over the little divots of his spine, the soft tan skin there. 

“Can I take this off?” His voice was muffled by his mouth on Craig’s throat. Craig nodded and reached for his own zip up hoodie. He kissed every bit of skin that was exposed. His long tan throat, his sharp collarbones. He kissed down his chest, teased at a brown nipple. The high points of his rib cage, down to his flat stomach. He wasn’t scared like he was last time, he was a man on a mission. He kissed down to his bony hips, sucked a mark there too. He pressed his fingers into his hips, he had perfect sharp hip bones. He heard Craig moan his name softly. This time it was different. The frantic pace they had before had settled into something slow, he wanted to savour every bit of it this time. He unzipped his skinny jeans, Craig lifted his hips up so he could pull this off. He settled between his legs and felt Craig roll his skinny hips up against his. He was thrusting with purpose between Craig’s legs, the friction was sweet, what came after was even better. 

He took him slowly this time, every thrust hitting with great purpose to make him moan and writhe underneath him. His head was nestled in the junction between Craig’s shoulder and throat. He marked him everywhere. His shoulders, his throat, his collarbones. His hips bore Stan Marsh’s mark. He wanted him to never forget he was here, that he belonged to Stan. He watched his tip his head back onto the pillow and expose his throat in submission. He came with Stan’s name on his lips and a moan. Stan groaned Craig’s name and he just wanted to lay there for a moment still inside of him. That this was the most intimate thing he had ever done. This was the moment that would define him the rest of his life. He had Craig Tucker, they were one. He belonged to him. Nothing was going to tear them apart. He caught his breath and rolled off Craig and gathered him into his arms. He kissed the top of his head and the tip of his nose and his lips.

They curled around each other and Stan felt so at peace with the world right now. Like everything was as it should be. Craig made him feel peaceful, like he found his place in the world and he could stand still for a moment. He held him in his arms and fell into a deep restful sleep. Everything was as it should be.

**Author's Note:**

> This is a college AU. Also, Kenny is not our villain, don't forget that.


End file.
